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About Digital Art / Hobbyist Premium Member Dhanish22/Male/Australia Groups :icontouhou-city-sect: Touhou-City-Sect
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So, I just watched a gamer-streamer who I like and respect rebuff a guest in his chat asking for help with emotional issues and self-harm.
Death's Butterfly by Zucreelo
Mixed feelings.

On one hand I think the person who made that comment shouldn't've done so on a public forum and to a no-nonsense and opinionated figure. The move seems almost like a bait and a plea for attention. On the other, the streamer's comments about cutting friendships with any self-harmers by default, and asserting that people who do need to grow the eff up ... they hurt. And scare me.

I wanted to ask ... is it a common experience for you guys? Is self-harm a friendship ender, moreso than other mental health issues? What kind of mentality ... makes it okay to abandon a person upon learning about their darkest often-secret habits?

I don't like the "grow up" mentality. Since when do depressive drinkers, binge-eaters, smokers get told to grow up as much? What kind of culture of eternal hiding and shame does it breed when a friend gets told to get lost and get over it "or the friendship is over" when they feel brave enough to come out with it?

"It's something you can change." << People who assert this don't understand the complex emotional and thought traps behind the habit, which are different for each person. Never mind the gnawing physical need. If only it were as simple to choose to walk to the park instead of to cut, burn, bite, beat ... Yes you CAN change it, but it's not an overnight thing that gets better by being told to grow up.

At the same time, I know it's delicate. I firmly believe everyone who succumbs to it needs compassion and support. Those who abuse it for attention ... I find it hard to understand them, but I know they might exist; they STILL need help of some sort to pull them away from its use, from the need to cry for affection so destructively.

So tell me. Are people who end things with a self-harming friend usually reacting with disgust on principle, or pulling themselves away from something they don't know how to deal with - perhaps even after having tried but to no change? I think I'd be more forgiving of the latter.

And on the harmers' side. Are you comfortable with the idea of an expectation of silence or "control"? To withold letting it show to your friends to stay on their good books. Do attention-seekers "make us look bad" and should be discouraged and told to tone down, or do they have their brand of issue that needs dealing with in a completely different way, compared to the secret harmers?

Any and all of your thoughts are appreciated.

<3

- D.

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Zucreelo's Profile Picture
Zucreelo
Dhanish
Artist | Hobbyist | Digital Art
Australia
Interests

HIKARI - Meramipop


Soundtrack to my life of late, ze. ~

Webcam

Pictures as covers on Literature Deviations! Yea or Nay? 

55%
17 deviants said YEA. Books have covers don't they? Sweets have wrappers don't they? Marisa has bloomers doesn't she? :iconyanderemarisaplz:
16%
5 deviants said NAH. Because dArtists have the attention levels of goldfish, and will click away as soon as they see text anyway. :iconsadaliceplz:
10%
3 deviants said YUSH. Because dA is lazy and stoopit. You gotta resort to underhanded tricks to make them look at anything other than glossy frontpage bewbs. :iconyukaritrollfaceplz:
10%
3 deviants said NAY. Have some pride in writing as WRITING! You fool! :iconhoorayplz:
10%
3 deviants said NOPE. True fans know better than to judge a book by the frills on her garb or the stuffing in her bra! :iconsakuyarapefaceplz:
0%
No deviants said YES. Hook those suckers in with some raunchy Yoshika pin-ups and hit them with a slab of irrelevant prose before they see it coming! :icondisgustedfutoplz:

Comments


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:iconhoshigumadouji:
hoshigumadouji Featured By Owner May 2, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
WEBCAM.
Reply
:iconzucreelo:
Zucreelo Featured By Owner May 3, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Story of my life.
Reply
:iconhoshigumadouji:
hoshigumadouji Featured By Owner May 3, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
I love it!
Reply
:iconkeyman94:
Keyman94 Featured By Owner Apr 30, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Reply
:iconkeyman94:
Keyman94 Featured By Owner Apr 6, 2014  Hobbyist Artist
Your Mima pic seems popular with youtubers :iconmimaplz:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=woxJL9…
Reply
:iconhoshigumadouji:
hoshigumadouji Featured By Owner Feb 24, 2014  Hobbyist Writer
ZUCREEEEEEEEEEEELO
Reply
:iconrokugurin:
RokuGurin Featured By Owner Dec 8, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Hey how's it going?
Reply
:iconzucreelo:
Zucreelo Featured By Owner May 26, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I didn't mean to leave this reply for MONTHS AND MONTHS on end. </3 Your friendliness is always appreciated! I see you go around dropping a hi on other friends of mine too and it's nice.

I'm well ... currently confusedly hopeful but have been in general states of gloom lately. Individual people make it better though. How are you?
Reply
:iconrokugurin:
RokuGurin Featured By Owner May 26, 2014  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Oh no problem. I  try to be as nice as I can to people. Of course, this kindness isn't always well met, but what can you do? I'm glad you appreciate it. A little kindness goes a long way.

Anyway, I'm gonna give you a watch. Keep up the good work, bro! :icondazeplz:
Reply
:iconflandre495:
flandre495 Featured By Owner Nov 23, 2013  Professional General Artist
Your art.
I wish I was that good. 
//kills self
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