So I had surgery on my right foot recently for a ganglion cyst that's been hiding there and bugging me during sport for way too long. My right leg vaguely resembles Okuu's now, only it's white and fluffy (with a hard-soled shoe-wrap support). Crutches are fun, but my little brothers keep stealing them.
Arriving in my ward after I woke up from anesthesia, the drug still in me made me high as Tenshi. I was immobilised by the operation, but mentally I wanted to run around catching up with people I'd held dear or those I'd been too anxious about returning to otherwise.
I've always had issues with being too reluctant or inhibited, and with that washed away, I briefly became my almost-ideal self - not perfect, but renewed and reborn. It was a really weird feeling.
I wish it lasted. Maybe being vulnerable or dependent on your loved ones through being sick or hospitalised puts things in a weird perspective and reboots your sense of purpose a little. I dunno. Has anyone else found this? I'd hoped to begin changing for the better the day I got home, but of course, there's no Felix Felicis in my system anymore, so I've slowed back to my usual crawl.
I wonder if I can bring it back somehow though. I wish it wouldn't take a drug to unlock it.
Of course, some people can have that kind of superdrive effect on you too. And a person can leave you with even worse withdrawal.
I guess some of us are hopeless addicts. Or maybe chemical slavery's a small price to pay, for being cherished company to someone dear.