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To peeps who've ever been on anti-depressants before.

... Have you ever had that urge to suddenly "go off" them? If so, how do you grapple with it, stay on the plan you've been prescribed? If not, what keeps you confident and happy with your current state using them?

(I'm talking about those people who have found something that actually seems to work for them. If it's a pill that causes stupid side-effects and isn't curbing your symptoms effectively, that makes the cynicism a little more valid.)

I've used my personal poor performance at the Kendo nationals last Saturday as a trigger to go cold turkey, as well as earlier heavy musings with personal relationships in the weeks prior. I'm at a weird junction now, trying figure out whether to continue or go back on - and how to construct my mindset in either case.
:iconnotsohappyaliceplz:

Likesay … If you decide to go off them, is that a sign that you're trying to take a more active approach to combating your own depression? Or are you "giving up" on your prospects of getting better? If you stay on them, how do you fight the feeling that they're pointless / not enough when you do get down even with their help - or that you're not trying hard enough? How optimistic are you about eventually having to wean off them, if you can?

Perhaps most critically … Are you yourself only when on these drugs - are you only the happy, fully-functional you with them to hold you up? Or are "you" really the you who falls apart without them - the you which you want to fix without hiding your darkest depths under any kind of "mask"?

... I know I'm perhaps being pointlessly philosophical about it. "Take the drugs you fool!" maybe is the simplest answer.
:icongandalfplz:
But in my various dabblings with undergraduate Psychology, I do know this: A person's mental attitude can have a MARKED influence on the ultimate outcome of their condition, whether or not the ACTUAL treatment was successful." Case point epileptics and pre-operative mood before lobectomies … *cuts rant short*

---

For any of you interested in my writing, this whole thing about pills and happiness is going to hopefully end up in a planned novel of mine. Mixed in with some crazy shit about a totalitarian regime in a dystopian reconstructed future, a segregated tower with floors testing different dimensions of human tolerance / suffering, a parallel world where everyone is female and compatible and gender divides mean fuck all, a collective resistance movement butting against reformists and apologists for a system that preserves the "natural and holy order of the world' …

So like … I have a personal as well as artistic interest in this topics. Depression seems to affect a marked number of people very dear to me too, so it's not just out of a concern for myself either. ~
(I'm actually very bad at caring much for myself, as certain close friends know well.)
:icontenshirapefaceplz:

Here's hoping y'all are well-ish okay and not dabbling crazily with chemical divorce like I am. I'd love to hear personal stories on your own dealings with this. <=]

<3

- D.
  • Listening to: Welcome to the Black Parade - My Chemical Romance

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~Zucreelo

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:iconthe42ndtengujournal:
*The42ndTenguJournal 2 days ago  Student General Artist
Zucreelo-kun, are you doing ok? ;w; I'm really worried about you.
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:iconzucreelo:
~Zucreelo 2 days ago  Hobbyist Digital Artist
I'm assignmenting rather ridiculously. I'll be okay, just (even more) quiet for awhile I guess. ^^" I hope you're well too?

Your recent Dropbox link may have just made my weekend / entire week or something. ~
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:iconthe42ndtengujournal:
*The42ndTenguJournal 5 days ago  Student General Artist
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:iconthe42ndtengujournal:
*The42ndTenguJournal May 7, 2013  Student General Artist
[link]

I think Aikido would be a good compliment to your Kendo. Just an idea.
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:iconzucreelo:
~Zucreelo May 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
[link] Looked up the Melbourne school. This Malaysian sensei associated with it gives a killer demo.

Heh, that loop was lulzy-unneeded but it could really be done, you realise after watching Joe Thanbu-sensei. Plus Mifune's just the most badass actor to see literally throwing people around.

I thought about Aiki at one time, and knowing it comes from the same weapons-based roots. I settled with Taekwon because of pragmatism, the training times suited me and it was easy access on campus. Plus I really like using kicks. In a way I feel kinda sheepish about being drawn to it chiefly by you. ^^" But I'm not going to quit just yet.

(Oh, and a future sparring session with Tres plays a big part in it too. Aiki's awkward because you'd break their limbs if they don't know how to land.)

There's a limit to how many arts I can juggle. =p I'm actually planning to self-study Iaido too in between 2-monthly interclub meets.
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:iconthe42ndtengujournal:
*The42ndTenguJournal May 5, 2013  Student General Artist
That picture you linked me to in my notes. It is saved in my portfolio on my desktop PC. Gonna save it on my Mac Laptop too.
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:iconzucreelo:
~Zucreelo May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Lovely. Let's hope it teases some scenic inspiration out of you in due time, ne?
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:iconthe42ndtengujournal:
*The42ndTenguJournal May 5, 2013  Student General Artist
I read through the book of five rings.

That's right the ENTIRE thing!

It's pretty wordy, but not all that long. I think it'll help your Kendo a lot.

It's actually helping me get through my finals.

It has cool stuff in it like.

"Do not lie to yourself

"Training reveals the true way."

"Do not let yourself become deceived by others."

"Familiarize yourself with all the arts."

"Familiarize yourself with all the skills."

"Timing is the most important aspect of strategy."

"The painter is an artisan of inks, the poet is an artisan of words, the warrior is an artisan of the battlefield."

COOL STUFF IN SHORT LITTLE BLURBS LIKE THIS!!!

Sorry about my lack of activity recently....I am having "Finals Depression Syndrome" in College.

I hope to hang with you all more once I'm on Summer Break~
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:iconzucreelo:
~Zucreelo May 5, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
How long is it? o,o My goodness, well done. I've started to think it ought to be really cool to refer to myself, since the philosphy's so applicable to the everyday. Wouldn't hurt to know what specific mindsets in Kendo are rooted in his writings too. =>

Blurbs are fun, much more digestible then lengthy spiels. Poignant and memorable to a fault!

Hang in there, I know it's been a bit of a ride. :hug: I'm floundering around too with my assessments, though surely not as stressed out as you. Let's hope you'll be happy and freed up in no time. ~
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:iconxatunatu:
~XatuNatu May 1, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
*KISSES YOUR FACE*
you have a radical art style i'm gonna follow you forever
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